What If You Weren't Afraid?
“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”
I remember reading the question and tucking it away for a future conversation with my husband. A few days later we were driving to the beach; the kids were buckled in with books to keep them entertained so I pulled out the question as I typically do when we have longer amounts of time in the car together. I asked, “what would you do if you weren’t afraid?” He responded with phrases that I expected and then returned the gesture by probing me with the same question. I exhaled and took a moment to search for the truthful answer. Smiling, I replied,“I already did that”. Three months ago I quit my day job. Truthfully I was terrified to make that jump for a long time. I was afraid to give up the stable income which kept our family enjoying life in Southern California (land of the exorbitant cost of living). I enjoyed the consistency of my regular client meetings, having spent years building those relationships and understanding their needs. I was happy with my co-workers and confident that I could stay there forever with work that provided satisfaction and decent wages. But I finally came to a point where I couldn’t ignore the stirring in my heart any longer. There was an inner voice that chanted, “you were made for more.” That whisper challenged me to consider what life would look like if I filled my days with the things I felt were the most important: loving my community, creating intentional time with my daughters, bringing a love for learning into our home and of course, focusing on words. What if my writing had the potential to reach more people, to inspire others, to encourage them, to challenge them? I knew they would never have that opportunity if I didn’t change course. I wrestled with walking away from what I knew, what I was good at and what was easy, comfortable and wise, knowing that quitting would be challenging, difficult and probably appear foolish. Eventually, I jumped. I sprang from security into the scary unknown. Today there are still many unknowns, much sacrifice and moments of anxiety. But there is no doubt that I made the right decision; I have incredible peace. Creativity flows and doors are swinging open. I wrote and released a short e-book called ENOUGH (if you haven’t had a chance to download that you can click here to get your free copy). My children are thriving in their home education and I live with more courage and greater faith for I have seen provision come out of lack. And by lack, I mean nothing. As in, write the check and pray. And when I say “provision” I mean faithful, never late, always more-than-enough supply. For God is faithful, friend. Perhaps you need to be reminded of these truths:
His timing is perfect (even when we don’t understand it). His promises remain the same (the bible isn’t a history book— it’s for you today). His faithfulness and goodness are unending (it’s not contingent on if you deserve it, or if He’s given it to you before). His ways are not our ways (very rarely anyway).
Chances are there is someone reading who recently took a leap of faith like I did. And now you’re unsure that it was the right decision. You are worried, doubtful and wondering where God is. I promise He has not forgotten you. He is near; He is listening and He is never late. Stay the course, call out to Him and be expectant. If you’re staring blankly at the question and it haunts you, know that you are not alone. Many people cannot articulate their dream and spend their lives trying to do so without success. Maybe this is your year to figure it out. Perhaps you aren’t supposed to take a giant leap but rather a series of small bunny hops over time. Ask God, your Father, the One who created you in His image, to speak and show you what He sees. What is it He wants you to do? And finally, there is most certainly someone reading who is suffocating under fear; your dreams terrify you. Someone once told you that your dream was too big, your voice was too small, your talent wasn’t great enough, you needed more money, more influence and more experience. You listened to those whispers and yet the dream remains. It’s small now, buried deep under responsibilities and commitments and you aren’t sure you have what it takes to resurrect them. But God does. He is the resurrector and He is also our provider. Money, connections, opportunities, talent— these are simple requests for Him. I hope you will take some time to ponder this simple question— these words which, when strung together, can inflict panic and doubt or cause our hearts to beat a little faster (sometimes both at the same time):